Remembrance

I was in 8th grade at Springman Middle School. As we were putting things in our lockers, a friend said that a plane had hit the World Trade Center. What's that? I had no context for the situation and pictured this building as a vast, but not very tall building. An announcement was made that teachers were not to talk about the events and were definitely not allowed to turn on the TVs. But that's not my clearest memory. The part I will never forget is leaving school that day. Walking out into the bright, warm September afternoon. Feeling increased pressure in my chest as I saw mothers crying into their children's shoulders and people hanging their heads. Hearing my mom explain the events on the short ride home. Sitting glued to the TV for the rest of the evening.

We were so impressionable at that age.

This morning, I crawled out of bed and snuggled on our cat-pee-scented couch to watch the memorial begin on TV. I didn't expect the uncontrollable sobs and intense heartache to come surging back. I didn't expect it to still matter so much.

I was so proud of our President for reading Psalm 46. A psalm that has meant so much to me over the years. A psalm that brought me to my knees this morning.

"God is our refuge and strength,

an ever-present help in trouble.

Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way

and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,

though its waters roar and foam

and the mountains quake with their surging.

There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,

the holy place where the Most High dwells.

God is within her, she will not fall;

God will help her at break of day.

Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall;

he lifts his voice, the earth melts.

The Lord Almighty is with us;

the God of Jacob is our fortress.

Come and see the works of the Lord,

the desolations he has brought on the earth.

He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth;

he breaks the bow and shatters the spear,

he burns the shields with fire.

'Be still, and know that I am God;

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth.'

The Lord Almighty is with us;

the God of Jacob is our fortress."